Fixing a Hernia
After one week of preparation yesterday was the umbilical hernia repair day. It meant stopping all supplements and most of my prescription drugs, no food or water after midnight before surgery and running the gauntlet (almost like TSA only different).
Check in was a snap, taking the long ride on the elevator from the 1st floor to the Basement was pretty quick. I had no sooner entered the waiting room area than the nurse came out and snatched me up.
We left my daughter (chauffer) in the waiting area, and I was accompanied by my wife to a private room (well sort of private). Pre surgery instructions were to remove all garments (except my socks), use surgical soap wipes front and back. Don the ICU (I see you) gown that is open in the back and lie flat on the gurney while the nurse got the IV going (sort of) and after a few really bad jokes (hers and mine) she was gone.
Soon another nurse replaced her, did the 40 questions thing, and then made sure my answers matched what I’d written on the paper. After “doctor sleep” came in and went over my complete medical history and what they were going to do to prevent my defibrillator from firing prematurely as they began their electronic incision. He was gone and then it was time.
Like a condemned man kissed my wife and daughter before being wheeled out and down to the surgical suite I was greeted by way too many people but it was like they were expecting me…..
After being told “take deep breaths” I lost track of them and time in general as I went off into La-La Land. I woke up in the recovery room and as I gained my wits (not a lot to get back together) I was told the operation lasted 45 minutes. I asked for coffee but got ice chips. I said I’m ready to go home and they prepped me to go back into the same room I was in before surgery.
I got my coffee as they went to bring my family back into the room. After 2 cups of coffee and 2 cups of water and a bit of applesauce I said I was ready to get dressed.
Not so fast they said, you have to get a normal BP, no dizziness and be able to empty my bladder (pee) in the toilet. After meeting those requirements I got my discharge instructions not to lift more than 10 pounds until I see my doctor in a couple of weeks. I got a free wheelchair ride out to the waiting vehicle and we escaped.
We got home and after some Thai fried rice, more water and a rerun of Rush Hour 2 it was time for bed.
Instead of the high powered pain pills I’ve been taking Tylenol and feeling pretty good.
I had to write this down or I wouldn’t remember it by tomorrow (or maybe longer).
Next month I go in for a generator change, more commonly known as a pacemaker/defibrillator change out since my 7 year battery life has lasted 10 years already with no incidents reported. I’m glad they used a magnet over the defibrillator to turn it off temporarily while they operated, I just didn’t want to be flopping around on the operating table while they tried to think of what to do about it. But hey that will be another story all together. – I am the Real Truckmaster!